May 22, 2012

How to please a woman—sex toy tips

Every man who is in a long term loving heterosexual relationship is always on the lookout for things that will sexually please his special woman.  Sex toy fetishes, sexual fantasies, and role playing are just some of the things a loving couple can explore if they wish to spice up their sex lives or just try out something different in bed.

Sex toys and realistic vibes do provide a means to achieve all of these things with your special woman.  Sex toy experiences however will not be satisfactory if one does not do things properly or if one rushes things.  Here are some tips on how to please your woman with sex toys.

The first thing you should do should happen even before you acquire or use a sex toy with her.  It makes perfect sense that if your intention is to please her sexually, you should choose or use a toy which caters to the way she likes being sexually aroused.  For instance, if your partner gets turned on by penetration then a dildo might be the best sex toy for you.  If clitoral stimulation drives her crazy then a strap on vibrator might be the best way to get her to where she wants to go.

The next thing one should keep in mind is that no matter what kind of sex toy you use it is always wise to use and to have sex toy lubrication in handy.  Example, when trying to insert a toy at the anus, try to use anal lube to make it easier. Keep in mind that while the body does generate its own natural lubrication to facilitate sex and to signal the deepening of sexual arousal, sex toys do not have their own natural lubrication.  The natural fluids excreted by our body during sexual arousal may also be inadequate since materials which sex toys are made of such as rubber or jelly can absorb these fluids.  Using sex toys without the proper and adequate lubrication can be extremely uncomfortable.  A water based sex toy lubricant is best for sex toys made of all types of materials.

When using sex toys or vibrators for the first time it is advisable to take your time and go slow.  Make sure your partner is relaxed and thoroughly sexually aroused before trying out your sex toy.

Be sensitive to how your woman reacts to the sex toy.  If you sense she is uncomfortable, ask whether she still likes what you are doing and if she confirms that she is experiencing discomfort, stop using the toy immediately.

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Female toys

I never gave using female toys like jelly vibrators a thought in my sessions in the sack with my wife until I stumbled onto her dildo when I was digging for a spare towel in her closet.

Seeing that dildo in her closet triggered certain insecurities about my ability to pleasure her, the frequency of our intimate moments, and my sexual prowess.  It took me sometime to gather enough courage to ask her about it and her reaction to my question surprised me—she laughed!

Seeing my disconcert at her reaction and feeling my discomfort about her use of female toys like classic vibes she tenderly raised her hand to my face and said with love in her eyes, “I use that when I miss you, darling.  Your job as a salesman takes you away from me for long periods of time and I do miss making love to you so I do the next best thing.”

Her answer reassured me a little but did not serve to completely soothe my feelings of inadequacy.  She sensed this and added, “A toy like that could never replace the real thing with you.  Do you want me to prove it?”

And with a twinkle in her eye, she took my hand and led me to the bedroom.

As we were both recovering and enjoying holding each other close in the afterglow, I realized some things.  A mere toy could never provide her the intimacy making love with me gives.  There is an emotional connection when I make love to my wife.  That connection could never be made with an inanimate toy.  Seeking affirmation about my epiphany I asked her about it.

With the infinite patience of a person who truly loves another she looked at me and said, “I could never hug a toy and it cannot kiss me back.  I need sexual release just as you do and when you are away, the dildo serves the purpose.   When you’re around I don’t even think about it.”

What I said next surprised even myself, “Could I see how you use it?”

After that night, female toys started playing a greater role in my sex life with my wife.  I rediscovered how it was such a turn on for me watching my wife get aroused and orgasm as I used or manipulated the sex toys to prolong her pleasure.  Needless to say our love making became more intense and we did it more often than before.  I even purchased a finger vibrators for her after she saw it behind an adult novelty store window and wondered aloud how it worked.  It worked wonders as far as I was concerned and I do not hear any disagreements from her either.

Female toys will never replace the real thing with someone you love.  In fact they can even help already special moments with your partner get even better!

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Advice For Women On Oral Sex

Women like men to go down. Men should do it right, but not all men have that knack. Sometimes men cannot satisfy women the way they want to be satisfied. Women do like when their dirty wishes come true.

The best ways to get things done the way you want is by telling your male partner what you want. Some women are afraid to do this. Others are a little shy. For women, if they haven’t try to do oral, they can practice this using classic vibrators. But it’s time to do some serious talking to your partner if he doesn’t please the hot spots right. The problem is that men cannot read what’s in your mind so you would have tell them what to do. While it is common that men please you using their tongues and lips (other than through osculation), sometimes they may be a bit reluctant.

If your husband or boyfriend has qualms then there are two things you can do. First, check out the privates. If it looks as though there’s a lush bush thingy going on or something, do something. Just as you won’t go down on him if his thingy is covered in wild growth of bush, chances are he won’t do to you either. So get those pubes nicely trimmed. A nice shave would also do the clean trick.

Don’t be too preoccupied with how your genitals look like. If it doesn’t look like the one’s you see in porn movies, that’s because each woman has a unique anatomy. The vulva’s appearance varies from one girl to another, just as different men do have different penile looks. If men afraid to have an oral sex with the girl, they can have an alternate way! Men can use g spot vibes to their partner to have a perfect orgasm.

Have you been thinking of buying an intimate wash because you’re worried that the sweet spots don’t smell sweet after all? Now, we cannot tell you to stop using them. But mind you, your vagina does have a natural secretion of fluids that act like a male “turn-on”. Washing your intimate zones too frequently can be not so ok after all. Stop living in the delusion that your vagina must smell like perfume. It won’t. Fact is that this hot zone is a self-maintaining organ, capable of cleaning itself most especially during arousal when it secretes lots of clear fluid. That natural odor could actually make your man go crazy over your sweet, lovely spot.

Do not hesitate to tell him to go slow or fast when you feel he should do so. Cunnilingus is actually an excellent way to stimulate the clitoris. It’s better for clitoral stimulation than intercourse is.

Don’t forget that while oral sex may be a little safer than intercourse, you should still use some protection like dental dams. This is safer like you are playing with  fun vibes. Women should not get pregnant on an oral sex. If you don’t like to use these devices, then make sure you are both healthy.

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